|thankfully, married "Mr Fix-it"|
the day ended like this..................NAILED IT!
But seriously, this is the house I come home too.....life is good!
The following day was miraculously a good one and all of the Christmas busy was too much! I suddenly needed ORDER again. I sorted out my entire desk drawer and then attacked the "junk drawer." I could simply no longer live and function with their daily chaos. I was ruthless and it felt good! Thank you Christmas for my "greater than usual inability to tolerate disorganization." My hubby was nervous about what of his he would find missing......hehehe! Still having a good day, hubby too me out to eat so I didn't have to think about cooking. The evening ended with Christmas lights and a stop at a bakery I had never been to, but now that I know it is there........my life just got so much better!
And, there is nothing like a day to change your whole self centered perspective on how you are already over crazy Christmas! I have a very, very dear uncle who has bravely and courageously been fighting cancer, with humor and grace! The cancer is progressing rapidly now and my heart is heavy; very, very heavy on this temporary earth. And, then comes the moments we all dread. As survivors, this hits home differently perhaps! There is also the struggle of "wanting to be there" for and with your dear family while still living with a broken limited brain (different limits than most people your age have.) I'll always be at high risk for everything. I will always need to respect those limits and pray for avoiding migraines, which only up these risks! There is the ever present reality that I don't simply "bounce back" and it is physically/mentally impossible to just push through it like I used to! This is an ever present struggle for me with often "self imposed guilt" as I perceive disappointing my family, the family whom I love dearly and would do anything for! I am blessed that they have all graciously walked this journey with me and are quick to forgive and understand!! But struggle, I still do!